Sarah Palin: Milking it for all she's worth.

Sarah Palin Matches David Letterman in Cheap, Classless Jokes

Note: this was written before this dingbat announced she was quitting her job as Governor of Alaska. I will address that towards the end of this opinion piece.

Hey Sarah Palin, how about you shut the fuck up? Why wouldn't your daughter (and you know which one Dave, and now me are referring to) get knocked up by Alex Rodriguez? She clearly has no problem with getting her groove on. Stop pretending that your daughter is some virtuous Madonna that is above reproach. She let some dude shove his dick in her like any other horny teenager would. Your cover is blown. You're not the perfect Christian family that you are trying to portray. And your wounded mother act is wearing thin. We know you are already running for President in 2012, and this is some pathetic attempt to lure women voters. That's pretty fucking cynical if you ask me. How stupid and gullible do you think women are?

What makes you think that most women will believe for even a nanosecond that you're standing up for their rights?

And don't you have a state to run? Wait, you know what, on second thought, keep making an ass of yourself and bring the Republican party to it's knees with your idiotic, retarded blathering. Hopefully you will tie your party to the religious nutters like you for good, ensuring that they never win another race. Power hungry fools like you only care about one thing, and that's power and glory. No tactic is off the table, and no lie is too big to overcome. You are using your daughter to garner sympathy from women in hopes of setting yourself up as the protector of women. But most of us are intelligent enough to know that we are seeing one more cynical politician that is out for herself.

And where was this propriety that you allegedly live by when you were slandering President Obama during the campaign? You practically called him a terrorist sympathizer, and you stirred up the innate paranoia and fear that right wing Christians lunatics suffer from by doing so. Spare me your offended sensibilities, asshole. I don't believe for a second that you are offended by anything you hear, considering the ease with which the lies and hyperbole spill from your lips. You sank the McCain campaign thanks to your bizarre babbling on all things global, and now you're sinking the Republican party faster than your ratings sank after your debate. Not that McCain had a choice with the fundies co-opting your party.

Actually, do shut your pie hole, I'll take the chance that fundies will sink the party that was once the party of Lincoln, all by themselves.

And isn't it so nice of you to step down as Governor of Alaska because you wanted to spare the "people." Please. You voluntarily step into the limelight to seek your glory when you had to know that you have no business being one step from the most powerful job on the planet, and we're supposed to believe that you care about the people of Alaska? Are you joking? Let's get to the real reason, shall we?

Dealing with the things that all governors deal with no longer had any appeal for you after you got a taste of the big stage, and now you can't be bothered with the petty details and minutiae of governing a meaningless state where you were no longer quite as popular as you once were. Some will say you are trying to avoid more probes into your actions, but I think it's more about that job holding you back. During the campaign you clearly demonstrated that you have no compunction about getting down and dirty, so I doubt that you were worried about such matters.

No, I think you are just like any other politician out to promote themselves and their agenda, and being a governor was holding you back. Who gives a fuck about the pledge you made when you took your oath as Governor, right Sarah? So you're the wet dream that every nutter has a hardon for? Goddamn, do they plan to ever get back in office? Well I guess it's down to you now that their other sanctimonious golden boy, Governor Mark Sanford got caught with his dick in a woman that wasn't his wife. Well Sarah, at least you aren't boring us to tears. I guess I should thank you for that. Maybe you and Mark could go on the road together as the paragons of Christian virtue that you so clearly are.

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